Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Distracted



I find myself constantly distracted, worrying about what other people think of me.  I honestly spend time worrying about it each day.  Wondering what they think of the way I look, the things I say, what I do.   I find it shapes me in so many ways, which makes me sad sometimes.  

That's why I never leave the house without make up!  After all...what would people think if they saw me with my hair in a pony-tail, in the ratty old t-shirt that I often wear around the house?  What if they find out that I dropped out of college, and they judge me for it?   Will they think I'm dumb?  And you know...they didn't laugh very hard after that joke I told.... I bet they are thinking how I talk too much....

Am I the only one that's distracted?  

Sometimes I wonder if it's low self esteem...or just the opposite?  Maybe I'm SO obsessed with myself that I think that everyone else really puts that much thought into what I'm wearing, what I'm saying, or what I'm doing.

Either way.... I cherish those moments when I can strip off the make up, strip off the personality, and just let go.   Just be me.   
Because really.... that's enough.  

What is your distraction?





14 comments:

  1. I think I've "given up"... Seriously, I have been so scrubby lately it's as if I couldn't possibly care about any of this! But then I go to the grocery store and I see a cute guy checking me out and I think "What the heck? Can't he see how beat down I look right now?" So yeah, I'm distracted too, even in my state of not being distracted!

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  2. I am the same way. I always worry about how I look, how I sound, how I come off... and I am pretty sure I'm slightly self-obsessed.

    You can't help it, though. It's hard to be so awesome in general. It's a hard thing to live up to! :)

    I think you always look beautiful and I didn't even know about your college situation. You are doing great with your business, and because you have a second job I think of you as ambitious and driven!

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  3. Wow." Is it that I'm so obsessed with myself""-never thought of it like that before. Yikes. So true.

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  4. Yeah I think we're all slightly self obsessed sometimes! We all have those days!

    And you know, I don't even care that I didn't complete college, because I love what I do and there's nothing that I want to get a degree for, but sometimes I worry what OTHER people will think about it.
    Who cares!??? I'm fine with it, so that's all that matters!

    Exactly Amber,.... it's hard being so awesome.

    xoxox ; )

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  5. I definitely feel this way. But I'm more worried about what people will think of what I say or how I am. Good post!!!!

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  6. I used to worry about that. I really don't know how I stopped worrying, but now I don't care.
    I think you are a lovely person!


    LOVE!

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  7. Ashley, Ashley, Ashley---

    OK, I just took this class which helped me SO much. We spend so much time doing the post conversation analyzation. You know, where you have a conversation with someone and spend all this time re-hashing it in your mind. What were they really saying? Did I really do that wrong? Gee-that was the dumbest thing. The message was that these people do not think about everything we said as much as we think they did. They were too worried about themselves and what they may have said wrong or how they came across.

    Forget what they think-be yourself. There is a BIG line between self and adding that ish. Your life is your life and it is brilliant. Who gives a toot what anyone else thinks.

    I never ever leave the house with makeup, heck I barely leave the bedroom without makeup...but that is for ME. I feel more confident and then I can conquer the world. Just think of it that way.

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  8. Actually I have a problem with confidence and self esteem too but I've been told people don't judge us as bad as we do :)

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  9. I so feel your pain! I'm the same way. I think it is Dr. Phil that said that we worry about what other people think and truth be told they aren't thinking about you at all.

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  10. The truth of the matter is, whether you're wearing a ratty t-shirt with your hair up...or dressed to the nines fully made up...the people who really matter see the same person. :)

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  11. I used to love saying that at the of the day I would wash the city off my face. I'm right there with you, there are days when I put in too much effort, but usually that makes me feel god too! But then there are some days that I just don't care. But like my boyfriend likes to say, I'm the most beautiful when I'm sleeping or just waking up! So know that you are probably looking wonderful no matter what you're wearing, as long as you feel good that's all that matters! :-D

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  12. I was also the same way with make up and now I am better about it so I can go outside without it. I once read that most people are busy thinking about themselves (case in point), that they are not worried about us. :0)

    p.s. Thanks for your comment at my sex post. Hope to see you for Friday Follow.

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  13. Ditto. I too do NOT let ppl see me w/o makeup unless it's just family. I make sure I am dressed well when I leave the house, because I too am obsessed with what others will think of me. UGH! Most of the time though it's for me, because that's how I feel comfortable and what makes me feel good about myself.

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